6 YEARS LATER (17 YEARS OLD)
I hear people talk, but I don't really listen. I mean, what is the point? My grades have been straight F's except for a D+ in Chemistry. I have to go to school mom says. She has been the biggest pain in the ass since dad died when I was 13 and she stopped "the drug scene" when I was 14. I don't really care what she says, or what she does, all I care about is one thing, LIFE. It is the one constant thing in my life and I refuse to give it up, no matter what it costs. The bell rings and I rush out to the hallway, there is an assembly and I plan to skip it and catch some precious steam time. I hurry behind the gym before anyone can see me. Not looking where I was going, I bumped into some kid."Hey watch it. Will ya?"
I look up. He must be new because it would be impossible for me not to hear of him. He was gorgeous. The most amazing creature that has ever roamed the earth. He had blue eyes that looked like the deepest parts of the ocean. He had light brown hair that came around his eyes like a weeping willows' leaves. And his body? Oh his biceps looked like they could move mountains, his abs perfectly sculpted, and his legs were like G-D himself sculpted them to be absolutely perfect. When he smiled it almost made me faint.
"Sorry, I'm new and I'm just trying to find the gym for an assembly, I guess."
I was speechless. Thank goodness that the drug didn't affect your appearence just your mind.
"Right well this is actually the back. I was on my way there just now."
I guess I would have to wait till I got home to do my thing.
"Mind if I walk with you?"
"Sure......"
"Connor"
"Connor, I'm Luna"
He smiled and we walked to the assembly together. Now let's skip a couple months ahead because fankly, although I hate to admit it, we had the typically high school love story. We got to know eachother and then when he asked me out I said yes. We kissed, we hugged, we held hands, pretty much every base but home plate. I will never go to home plate with anyone ever again.
10 MONTHS LATER
I am so in love with Connor, it isn't even funny. I love him sooo much and I sound like a total chick, but I am so it's okay. We talk every night and know everything about eachother except one thing, he doesn't know that I do drugs. It has been hard keeping a big part of my life away from him but I just haven't found the right moment to tell him. I feel a an arm loop around me and realize it's Connor. He kisses me and we interlock our fingers."Hey, babe, what are you doing tonight? Wanna catch a flick? I hear that there is a new Adam Sandler movie out."
My favorite actor is Adam. I can't go though because I have to restock on LIFE, but what excuse should I give him now. I look into his deep blue eyes and decide that there ahould be no more lies. So nonchalantly, I reply.
"Can't, baby. Sorry. I have to go to my dealer tonight because he just got a new batch of LIFE and I have to get it quick because it is high in demand now."
I put on a ginormous smilr but he didn't smile back. He just looked me, like I was a stanger, a stranger he loathed.
"You do drugs?"
"Yea since about 11"
"How come you have never told me? Age 11? Of all drugs, why LIFE? It screws up your mind."
He was up now and I felt like I was being lectured.
"You never asked, yes age 11, and becasue that is the one I prefer. I know it does, by the way, I do take it."
"You can't take it anymore. If you keep taking it then we can't be together."
SHATTTERRR GOES MY HEART. Is he serious? He was asking me to give up the one steady thing in my life? But wait it wasn't the only steady thing was it? No, he was the other steady thing in my life. The one thing other than LIFE and other things that made me happy.
"Okay I promise that I will try really hard to stop doing all drugs, especially LIFE."
His smile was starting to come back.
"Good. So how about that movie tonight?"
"Still no on that. How about you come over. My mom isn't home and we can watch your favorite movie, Billy Madison."
"Okay, fine. Seee you tonight."
Later that night I was gettting ready when the doorbell rang. It was Connor. I gave him a big hug and kiss and tried to hide how much willpower it was taking me to not run out of that door and go to my dealer. He brought popcorn. I popped it in the micrwave (pun intended) and put the movie in. We ate, kissed, and watched the movie all night long, over and over again. He slept over, that is all he did, sleep. I woke up the next morning to Connor's sleeping face. I decided to go make breakfast. I went to the kitchen and realized we had no eggs, so I wrote a note and went to the store. As I was approaching the store, is when I smelt it. My brain and heart were saying no but my body was saying yes. I had to have some. I rounded the back of the supermarket and the smel was coming on stronger. That is when I saw it. It wasn't LIFE, it was marijuana. I had to have some. It was nowhere as near as fufilling as LIFE but I was so desperate that I would have sniffed paint.
"You gonna keep starin or ya gonna take a whifff?"
He extended his hand with the bud in it to me. I did say try, right?
I was trying to wipe the smell of the drugs off me when I was going home but was not successful. I walked in and Connor was at the counter eating a cracker. He came over and hugged me and as soon as his body stiffened I knew he knew.
"Did you really, Luna?"
"Yea."
I thought we were done right then and there but instead he said.
"Come on. I wanna show you something."
I listened because truthfully I did not want to end things with him. He was my everything. We drove for about 40 mionutes in silence to a forest. He parked the car and we got out. He led me deep in the forest and stopped when we came to a bush. This bush was special though. I don't know how but this bush had one rose, that looked as if it was shining. The most amazing part was that it was the only rose in the bush. It was surround by horrible, twisty, dark weeds that seemed to try to engulf the rose, as I am sure it did the others, but the rose was strong. Why had Connor brought me here? I looked towards him and saw him lifting up his sleeves to about mid arm right above the elbow. There in his skin were lttle scratches.
"When I was little my mom and dad were druggies. Their life was drugs. They ate, breathed, and slept them. I used to come here when they would do them and look at this rose. This is what kept me going. What kept me fighting to livr, because if this rose can overcome all the darkness that surrounds it, why couldn't I? When I was about 15 they overdosed, well over steamed I guess on LIFE. I swore that I would never do drugs in my life. Do you get why, now, I can't be with you if you don't stop?"
His eyes were pleading with mine. It broke my heart. Of course I understood.
"I'm sorry Connor but I just can't. Drugs have been my comfort through good and bad times."
He looked hurt, which I understood completely. But if he really loved me then why was he making me choose between the two most loved things in my life?
"So I guess that's it then. Come on let's get you home."
We drove home in silence, no music, no nothing. He dropped me off without even saying a word, then drove off. The next day at school he wasn't there. I asked around and found out that he transfered to the private school in the area. I was enraged. After school, I ran home and packed my bags. I left a note explaining to my mom why I could no longer take living there and was going on my own. I brought only 500 bucks for food and gas, hoping it would last me until I ffound a job, far away. Determined to leave before my mom even got home, I grabbed my keys, money, LIFE, and left everything behind.
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